Conceptual. Factual. Me.

I can honestly and truly say that I am finding my happy place. It was there all along, I just had to choose to be am happy. If given a choice between happiness and sadness, I'm sure you would choose to be happy too, but will you? Do you?

I now realize that for me to become who I am, I had to first experience what I am not. I had to endure pain and discomfort to desire happiness and security. If I hadn't been tested by the trials of life, I would be complacent and never desire growth or change on a physical level or a spiritual level. Let me be the first to tell you, life has dished out some tough experiences that had my soul trapped in hell and kept me sobbing profusely.

What has changed? My perspective. My experiences have been there to show me who it is that I really am. It took realizing this to escape from my self tormenting hell. I have broken the shackles of my soul from the ball and chain of my mind. I am now free to experience living without feeling like the world is out to get me. I am now free to make choices between two things without feeling that one is right or wrong. I now look at things by what it will do to help me grow as a person in order to experience all that life has to offer me, rather than what worldy desires I can gain out of it. I spend my days searching to discover and rediscover who I am and who I want to be.

I like to say that I'm a girl who is habitually vague. Somewhat accomplished. Somewhat a failure. Gave birth to a pyschic and a hell raiser, and sometimes it looks like I'm in complete control.

But really Who am I? I am a fountain of knowledge. I am unique and intriguing. I am curious and searching. I am a student, a mother, a daughter, a friend, a confidant, a survivor, and a teacher. I am honest and real. I am a great person. I am in love with myself. I am enjoying life. I am aware of my being. I am in tune with my soul. I am engaged with life. I am fond of pain. I am interested in hurt. I am enthrawled with risk. I am challenged by anger. I am relentless against denial. I am capable of anything. I am eagar for the future. I am hopeful for everyone. I am excited by experience. I am pleased with my growth. I live. I love. I learn. Who do I want to be? The best me I possibly can! Nothing more, nothing less!

I am forever learning. I am an expression of God.